31st of December 2010. Time to think back.

Hello, Neih hou, Bonjour, Namaste, Bievennue,

      My, my, time really flies. In a glimpse of an eye, it is now the end of another year. This is the despair of of life, life is like a brief candle, time travels so fast that you don't realize that it has come to an end of a certain chapter. As for me, I had a pretty fucked up year in 2010, I don't even know what I had accomplished and done good, everything seemed to be a mess to me. 

      Have you ever feel so lazy and everything seemed so unimportant till the extend that you procrastinate everything till the very end? I'm scared to hell, I really am. I had never felt this lazy before, I had never done things in the last minute, I had never felt this tired and unenergized before. Since young, I had taken my personal excellence for granted. I was great in everything you name it, except for sports( I hate sports)...Until this year, everything had gone down hill due to my slackness.

     I needed to change, but I simply don't have the willpower to do so. I need a friend that can help me, but admit it,  everybody is too busy for themselves. I don't feel like a perfect person anymore, my skills are deteriorating. My language is rotten. My Chinese Language seemed so unfamiliar, My English grammar and vocabulary is rusting and evaporating day by day, My Malay Language is getting stranger. (And I can sense that the comment area is gonna be filled with " Everybody is not perfect" comments) 

     I have gotten to know that my health is not in tip top condition after the blood test. My liver and my blood have problems. My mom is freaking out after the results were back. Eventually, my haemoglobin is too small and my bile duct is too narrow. That means I will get a " Mild Asthma" after a short distance run. Other people might be running for a longer distance and not feel a thing. But as for me, a round or two is hell. About my bile duct, it is narrower than anybody. That means my liver can't process all the toxins and fats like normal people, it carries out the process in a "ZEN" manner. 

     After the blood test, my mom has been treating me like a cancer/ AIDS patient, like I am about to die soon. She prohibits me from eating salty, preserved, oily and sweet (UNHEALTHY) food. Come on! I don't want to live like an old person , for goodness' sake. The doctor said I can't eat those food regularly, not cannot eat all. WTF)*#_$@)_$)_!@*)@!&)#.

      What did you guys plan for 2011? What are you looking forward to?

Signing off,

Jason Von Lee

As lazy as always.

I hate shells.

Hello, Neih hou, Bonjour, Namaste, Bievennue,

                                                                          

        Wow, two posts in less than 24 hours, couldn't believe myself, as usual , I am still slacking and delaying my tasks and surfing the net. (kinda became my habit this year, I know its bad).( if you don't see why I wrote in less than 24 hours, read the ending first).

        Since form 4, I somehow understands what elder people say, that the society is complicated and very harsh. Before that, I somehow just think that going out to the society is just working and earning money, and it turned out that I was wrong, very wrong, very very wrong.

      

        In form 4, you get to be elected as committee or a club, society or uniform body. Like always, I get to be elected to hold some high positions, which I am kinda worried because I am very busy and unorganized, as you know( if you read my previous post, I am kinda in a tornado-mode). 

        Like my parents always say, there are many kinds of people in the society,Demons, Ignorant, Foolish-er, Make you say WTF- er, and many more. Of course, they will also be people who are Good Samaritans and helps you when you have troubles. However, people who can do work are getting lesser and lesser.

       As a leader, you must plan, organize, lead and do whatever it takes to keep your organization going. Of course, this is not a one man show, a good leader must work with good armies and fight with powerful weapons. Problems start when you don't have good armies and powerful weapons, how are you going to fight?

      What I went through myself this year is, that the younger generations these days are not thinking maturely and acting like they really know a lot. During club and society meetings, I can see that they are trying their best to look professional, so what? What pisses me off is, they tend to give empty ideas and love beating around the bush. For example, it is time to contribute some ideas for making an event successful and special. Then these people will be like giving ideas such as: we must do well, we must do better than last year, we should not remake the mistake like last year. 

Dear readers,

Do you think those are ideas? Do the ideas even help?  

Just imagine having this kind of ideas throughout the whole meeting, I wonder whether there will be an even to be held or not.

Another kind of people that really irritates me is, there are these leaders in the society that I really doubt have what it takes to be a leader. They just love to mess up everything. For example, I am a treasurer (treasurer's job is always related to money ,right?Of course you have to agree, if not I chop your head off! Just kidding........ kinda.)I was in this meeting for an event, and I nearly go off like a nuclear bomb. It was beyond my expectations, asking a treasurer to decorate the notice board and do stuffs like crafts. Are you also feeling the WTFness? I was already in bad mood before the meeting started, the chairman claimed that he or she had 'informED' every committee member to attend the meeting, but turned out it was just 4 of us, out of like a million members! And not just nobody turned up, the chairman was also in another meeting for a camp at the same venue. So, we were like waiting for an hour like idiots doing nothing till she finally came over to our table when I strutted over to their table and asked  him or her to come over. He or she informed us to arrive at 2pm, but the meeting somehow started at 3pm. How can a leader can be so unpunctual? 

One more thing, I also hate those people who assume that people can accept what his or her's interest. I am one of the editors for a magazine in my school and I am in-charge of computer editing and design. As a loyal reader to many magazines such as reader's digest, Calibre, Expat, August, National Geographic and whatever else, I know what a magazine should have or include in its spread. There was this geek who loves sci- fi and nerdy things such as those black hole, bermuda triangle, nobel prize article...blah. He assumes that what he likes will also be the interest of other people. Let me make it simple, he just puts inappropriate contents in an inappropriate magazine, Just like talking about fashion in Discovery Channel magazine, you get my idea right?

There are too much to be hated in this world, I just cant finish them just in one blog post.

A word from Jason, 

Know your capabilities, don't be an empty shell.A no brainer leader will only ruin the day.

P/S this post is supposed to be posted the next day I posted "Problems, Problems Everywhere" but somehow delayed.

Problems Problems Everywhere.

 Hello, Neih hou, Bonjour, Namaste, Bievennue,

        It has been so long since I have last blogged. You know, secondary school life is not the same anymore after you have step foot into the path of higher secondary, which is form 4. As a student who treats exams as a piece of cake (since PMR was so easy and I was getting like 80 and above for everything), I never expected form 4 to be such havoc. It was a choice between science- accounting class and pure science class, but considering the fact of not risking biology (since I don't know what I really want to do in the future, so I kept biology as my choice considering the fact maybe medical is one of the options when I am desperate). However, accounting has also had me beating around the bush, choosing between these two options (I assumed that I am kinda good in doing business because I love to sell things and negotiating).

        Back to the main topic, life has been a total mess to me this year. I have always believed that my grades are good and I have a happy life because I know how to plan my time wisely. It turned out that I was wrong because, this year, it was a battle between me and piles of undone homework, responsibilities, revision, stress, fatigue, tuition, club and society and uniform body. Studying in the morning session was a wise thing to do, I thought last year.(With all the time left during the afternoon, you can simply do whatever you want.) And obviously, I was wrong again! Waking up 5a.m in the morning is already a tough challenge, because I have only had 7 hours of sleep compared to last year I had 12 hours! After school, I have tuition at the city centre (quite a distance from school, have to get on a half an hour bus trip to get there). After tuition, it is normally already late evening, another tiring and cramp Light Rail Transit back to my housing area. By the time I was home, the fatigue and hunger is already killing me. Plus the fact of undone homework, I simply can't resist the sensation of sleepiness, gloomily crawling into my comfortable and warm bed.Basically, I have tuitions on Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday. Theory class, Aural class and Music class on Friday and Sunday. Lastly, private Additional Mathematics tuition at my house at Thursday night. See, my schedule are basically jammed with all these tuitions and classes! 

       

 During my days in Form 3, going to tuition classes was 'The Way' to get really outstanding grades. Things are opposite now, I felt that they are kinda a waste of time, I wonder it's my fault or the teachers'. Just imagine with all these activities going on, how do I clear my homework , do my revision and have time for other things. One more problem is, I am getting very lazy, I just don't know why. Once I am back from the school, my brain will automatically send a signal to my arms and legs and march towards the computer with my school uniform still on (usually happens when I come back for a bath before I go to tuition, sometimes I do not go to tuition straight from school). I drag everything till night and nothing is ever done! Today's work got dragged to the next day and the work next day got dragged to the day after tomorrow!It's not just homework, even when exam comes, I wait till the eleventh hour to do my revision!I remember I studied for Math exam 5 minutes before it started and the  marks are just 'Marvelous'.

Please, I need help!

I don't know where this laziness come from, whether its from my family, from me, or from my friends that are also like that. I was a student with second ranking in the whole Form 3 and now I can't even enter top 5 in my class ranking, what a disgrace!

Sometimes, I just don't dare to look the mirror, because I am ashamed of myself. I wonder what I am, I feel like a total mess!

Watching TV series everyday for hours and not even flipping a page in my homework, what am I doing?!

And there is a friend that I suspect is giving me all these negative qualities and I wanted to get- rid of him or her so that I can be free! Just that getting- rid of a friend is not as easy as you might think it is.

A word from Jason, do not mix with friends that are ' Eggs-gone rotten' because they simply affect you, very slowly and dreadfully.

Signing off,

Jason V. Lee